Now used to the idea… At 16 weeks

So here I am. 16 weeks. Still not feeling the twins (I can say the ‘t’ word now without having to sit down) but at my last ante-natal appointment the Consultant decided to do an impromptu scan which was a lovely surprise. And there they were, not the little jelly babies they were a few weeks ago, but with fine little bones kicking and punching about. One anterior (at the front) and one posterior (at the back). Heads side by side. Having a chat, and then a punch, then a kick. It is amazing these little creatures are inside of me.

Then I bring up the fact I would like a Caesarian.

The Consultant looks at me, a little puzzled, and says “well, why do you want to do that?”

Um, hello? ARE YOU KIDDING? Yes, clearly you are a man. Don’t get me wrong, when I thought I was pregnant with one, I was willing to give natural birth a go. If these 16 year olds can do it, I can, right? Now that there are two, my whole Aussie ‘she’ll be right, mate’ attitude has gone out the window. Speaking of windows, it could be the fact that at my first ante-natal appointment at 8 weeks my husband and I were in the midwife’s room, waiting while she returned, when we heard an almighty blood-curdling scream from the level above.

“What the hell is that?” I ask, terrified. The midwife returns. I ask again.

“Oh! She nervously replies, with a little chuckle, “that’s our labour ward on the next level.”

Really? It’s not sound-proofed like something from a Get Smart episode? There’s a woman up there right now screaming her head off like she is being murdered, and I can HEAR IT?

Honestly, why was the hospital designed where all rooms are facing a courtyard, a very echoey courtyard, where everyone can hear the screams from a labour ward? I come to the conclusion the hospital was designed by a man. I get to the car. I burst into tears. My husband asks me what is wrong. That poor woman! I exclaim. The fact I am pregnant is a little overwhelming. The fact that I somehow have to get it out is hitting home.

So now, due to new NHS guidelines, I must have a ‘counselling session’ with a midwife to go through the risks of a Caesarian (which I am well aware of already, I mean, I don’t willingly ask someone to slice me open on a whim, right?) Happy to do that, but I’m not changing my mind, thank you very much. Not with two on board.